6 Questions To Ask Yourself Before Adopting A Child

Deciding to welcome a child into your home is a beautiful thing. Having worked with hundreds of families in the Bay Area, we know first-hand that all parents love their children, no matter how they join them.

Adoption is a lovely choice for many families, but it isn’t easy. Assuming you have already made the important decision to adopt, you still need to be sure you’re emotionally prepared for all this process entails.

In our experience, it’s best when families are clear on the following personal questions, before starting the legal process of adoption in California.

1. Have you completely moved on from infertility?

   There are many reasons to adopt a child or become a legal guardian, but couples often turn to this option after experiencing infertility.

   Infertility treatment can often be a long and difficult process. Living in hope that you’ll one day conceive can be draining, and it can be hard to let that hope go.Infertility treatment and legal adoption are both complicated and emotional journeys. Are you ready to stop actively trying for a biological baby, so you can devote all your love and attention to a child who doesn’t share your DNA?

2. Is this the right time to adopt?

   Have you experienced a major life event or trauma in the past year or so? If you’ve moved, divorced, been sick or lost your job, for example, you may already have enough on your emotional plate. Adoption is a major life event, best pursued when you are in a healthy place where you can give it the attention it requires.

3. Are you and your family on the same page?

   You do not have to be married to adopt in California, although private agencies can have their own requirements. That said, many would-be adopters are married or in domestic partnerships.

   If you have a partner, do they want to be actively involved in the adoption process? Do they share your dream? Just like a biological child can’t magically solve problems in your marriage, an adopted child can’t, either – and it’s not fair to anyone to try to force things.

   Similarly, adoption will affect everyone in your family. If you already have children, it’s important to consider their feelings and needs in this situation as well.

4. Will your extended family be supportive of your adoption decision (and does that matter to you)? What resources are available to you?

   Before you begin the adoption process, it’s important to think about how you will share your happy news with your family, and how you think they might react. Not all families are supportive of adoption, so you should be prepared for any reaction.

   And it takes a village to raise a child. Will you have the social and community resources in place to embrace your new family fully?

5. The adoption process can be emotionally draining – are you ready for it?

   Adoption requires a lot of paperwork, a lot of waiting, and a lot of ups and downs. Waiting to be matched with a child can be particularly emotionally draining.

   Moreover, you will need to be 100% honest and transparent in the adoption process. Are you willing to provide your financial records, employers, family, medical and psychiatric history, criminal background, and more?

6. Are you legally able to adopt children?

   While adoption is an emotional decision, it’s also a legal one. You should be aware of the legal requirements of adoption before investing time, money and your emotions into the process.

   In California, there is no age limit to adopting children, and you do not have to be wealthy or married. That said, you must be at least 10 years older than the child you are adopting, unless you are a stepparent, sibling, first cousin, aunt or uncle.

   To adopt in California, you must also undergo a home study, which includes a criminal background check. During this home study, you will be required to submit fingerprints, complete a physical examination, attend adoption classes, and complete individual interviews and an in-home visit and investigation with a social worker.

   You will not be able to legally adopt if you or any adult in your home has been convicted of child abuse or neglect, spousal abuse, a crime against a child (which includes child pornography) or a violent crime. The same is true of convictions of physical assault, battery, or drug- or alcohol- related offenses within the last 5 years.

   That said, depending on the nature of a previous conviction you or an adult living in your home may have, the social worker may approve you for adoption if they believe you have learned from your mistakes and taken steps to correct them.

Whether you are considering legal guardianship of children, termination of parental rights or adoption in California, we’re here to help everything go smoothly. Our full-service law firm has served Santa Rosa, California, and the Bay Area for over 24 years.

Our solutions and approach adapt to each client’s unique problem, and our cases resolve as quickly as possible, saving you time and stress. Meet our team to learn more.